Transition almost up

Here I am 2 weeks from departure into the next chapter of my life and I'm wondering what happened to my summer. Because I was expecting 6 weeks of vast nothingness, only to find them filled with preparations of living. I spent 6 weeks enjoying everything about my childhood home. I spent it learning and growing in ways I never imagined.

I find myself looking forward constantly, but there are times when I seem to hang in the balance. I spent yesterday with L and co. Whenever I'm with L memories of high school come flooding back. Memories of that wonderful summer between 9th and 10th grade, between 10th and 11th grade. And we're all a little older now...and we all know that when a lot of conversation is about college....when everyone in the car is going to be at college this year. Now F is the only one between that hodge podge group who has to remain. I remember being in F's position....not so long ago.

I spent 2 years wanting to leave, and I still want it. Yet, something makes me pause just that little bit more. Something makes me want to take pictures and capture this. Something makes me want to pull A closer and never let him go. Nostalgia, or perhaps the need to remember everything good about my childhood. But I think those feelings about A are on a deeper level. I think we're destined for something more in the future. I don't know what that will be, but I have an inkling....I trust the future, up until now it seems to make everything- good and bad- happen with a purpose. Or at least I like that outlook on my life.